Sorry Slade!

Ok so background narrative? (Scene setting? Wish Id actually completed that Writers Bureau course now!)

The first band my son saw was "The Bar Steward Sons of Val Doonican" his first film "World's Greatest Dad" just hope he grows up with a similar sense of humor!

Wish I could say he was planned. I knew I wanted a child, the biological clock had been kicking for a few years but the plan was to have some more fun, get a counselling job, meet Mr Right, get married (though probably not one of those big white dos seeing as I was never christened!) & then have a baby.

However what actually happened was I took Mr Very wrong to Australia for his 30th- he had promised me that all his problems would melt away in the land of opportunity & that one day we could move out there and live happily ever after (yeah right!) It was a wonderful holiday despite things between us having deteriorated to the point where we nearly travelled separately- think he was banking on fact that Id be depenant on him & his mate in Syndneys spare room (no chance mate survived Egypt on my own so reckoned Aus would be a little safer/ easier) So yeah wonderful snorkelling in the barrier reef, chasing a dingo on Fraser Island (was afterwards told theyre a bit more dangerous than dogs!), stargazing at Ayers Rock etc etc etc but to be honest wouldve been the holiday of a lifetime with someone who wasnt such a miserable bastard & didnt just want to stay & get pissed with his mates at Coogee Bay :)

So we got back from Aus via Hong Kong my asthma having deteriorated to the point where I had the worst cough the practise nurse had seen in his 20 year career. I knew the relationship was dead in the water however it was a couple of months before my 30th birthday & a big part of me didnt want to enter that decade alone. Think it wouldve been a case of sense will out had it not been for a call from my ex's Dad.

I was at a leaving do for a policeman with a funny name (nope not gonna put it on here!) Id had too many mojitos to join the game of pool- so was free to take the phonecall. He went on at great length about what a great person I was and how fantastic I was for my ex. I dont know whether it was his intention to guilt trip me into staying with him but it worked.... long enough for him to get me up the duff anyway!

My 30th was spent getting hammered at the Cavern Club. Thank God the rest of it was a lot more sedate and involved Chinese buffets, Gormley statues & Angels & Demons (the film that is!) A couple of weeks later I went to Home Bargains & got a pregnancy test, bottle of wine & a lot of chocolate. The test was positive, the wine went in the rack to gather dust! The chocolate however.... Of course I didnt trust a test from Home Bargains completely but the one from Boots in the toilets at work the next day confirmed things.

Pregnant...........................   t b c